Tuesday, October 15, 2013

The belligerent ewe-

    "Get up" I say to the belligerent ewe.
She's a new one to me,
One that I've purchased along with sixty others.
"Get up" I say,
"Your feet can't be that sore!"
She's one of three limpers that have come with the bunch I've just acquired.
"Get up ya dosy bitch!!!"
My temper rises now,
I have things to get done, and my dogs are confused by her unwillingness to move.
I am as frustrated by their frustration as I am of my own.
"Stand up ya fucking cunt!!!!"
I'm beyond compassion now,
beyond reason.
The dogs are nervous,
An unwilling ewe is one thing;
Enough to cause them pause,
An angry "master" is a thing enough to cause them doubt.
Here in this moment
Now!
Here is the place that I have come to fear,
Here is the fury, that I hope to out grow.
Now! Not later!!!
Let anger subside.
Look too your dogs,
Their fear
Their trust
Become now,
Not later,
Now!
Become worthy of their faith, and their trust.
Look!
Now!
Not later, in regret!!!
NOW!!!
Look now and see an old ewe,
her feet sore.
Yes she'd rather burry her head in a hedge
and die there rather than be pushed about!
But have compassion!!!
Her unwillingness defines her.
She is unpleasant,
yes.
But would ever I wish to be cruel?
Who does it serve,
my cruelty?
None.
Only my pride.
Now!!! Now!! Now!
Breath,
Step back,
Smile....
look with compassion on those whom you not only depend on,
but love.
Let your compassion define you...
For your creatures can only be what they are...
love them for their limitations,
thank them,
envy them,
Because they are defined by their nature,
And your are defined by your compassion,
and your ability to conform to their nature...
a nature
that you did not create,
but one that you must enter into...
a structure that you do not define,
but instead defines you......
Make this your living....
Make this your livelihood,
that in molding your self to this nature,
you find your self anew....
Beg forgiveness....
Grow....
Invent yourself daily,
in this way find yourself.
in this way, your anger will subside,
your frustration diminish.
In this way you become what you have not been before.